Hello and Happy Thanksgiving

(I know we are quite late)

As I (Aly) was sitting here, on thanksgiving, missing my biological family and childhood friends, I realized I shouldn’t. I don’t mean that in a “I don’t care/want to see them” way but rather a “I need to live my life” kind of way. We have had such a great year and a great time here in the Maritimes. We have had many family members visit and some friends as well. There is really no reason for me to be sad about “missing out” on family.

I have often thought that once I moved away from my family, I would be missing out on so much. In some ways I guess I am, but I am also experiencing so much more, and what I am experiencing has helped me grow and realize that family doesn’t just need to be biological. I know this is something you often learn about in church. People say “The Church is your family” many, many times. It has never really clicked to me though. Sure, it’s easy to say, but is it easy to treat the people in the Church as your family? Is it easy to forgive the people in a Church for saying something you found rude? Is it easy to love the people in the Church unconditionally? It really isn’t. I can forgive my biological family members without a second thought, because the mental category they are in means that “we are family // no matter what we do // you’ll be there for me // I will be there for you” Lyrics from Family by Tasman Jude. It’s this definition of family that is difficult to live out in church settings.

We were invited over to a Thanksgiving feast from someone in the Church. It was sort of a “family gathering” because the people who were there didn’t have family in the area. It was such a good time and really reminded me of being at home with my family, the only difference is that this was the Church family we have always been told about. We are beginning to latch on to this broader life principle.

I may be in love with Truro Alliance Church. They have some great people and some great practices. They have been teaching me what the Church family is, over and over again. They are such a loving group, so casual, so welcoming, and so real; just like family ought to be. From day one we have felt very included, and it feels like they have adopted us as family members. Our church is a great example of living out the concept of the Church family. It is not because everyone there doesn’t have family in the area, lots of people have family close by, but they are just amazing at treating each person like a part of their family. They get the concept that we are the Children of God, and “are fellow citizens with the saints and members of God’s household” Eph 2:19.

Sometimes our definitions of family are selfish, because we hold onto an unhealthy ideal of what our perfect family should look like. I am not trying to say that Truro Alliance Church is perfect, after all what family is perfect? None. I definitely am saying that they are doing something right. Although I felt lonely at the start of this Thanksgiving weekend, God is showing me how to truly believe that His Church is my Family.

Now for the hard part - WE need to be people that reciprocate this sort of action. WE need to treat the people in our church like family right back. This is the only way this larger concept of what a family is can live on. I’m so thankful that God has expanded our definition of what family is, but now we need to live it out - here, and in the future.

I challenge you, reader, to ponder whether or not your definition of family is too exclusive. Family means vulnerability, love, kindness, and an honest raw-ness. These are hard things to express sometimes, and are usually easiest with blood connections - but maybe you need to treat your sister-in-law like honest family, maybe a best friend, maybe someone at church. Maybe it will hurt, but maybe it will help you grow.

There is neither European or American, there is neither white collar or factory worker, there is no Froese or Neufeld, for you are all one in Christ Jesus - loose paraphrase of Gal 3:28